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Learning How to Be Happy

When I look back at the last few years, I really admire the woman I have grown into and the obstacles I have overcome.  I am at peace with where I am today.  I am truly grateful for the path I have chosen to follow.  With that being said, there are still things I struggle with and it's an ever evolving process to continue to heal and grow.  We all have parts of ourselves that we struggle to accept and it's so hard to fully love ourselves when there are parts of us that we don't necessarily like.  

For me, I have discovered that I am overly independent to the point that it's not always healthy and learning to allow others into my life is so difficult for me.  I don't truly understand how to overcome this issue, but I am all too aware of how it affects my life and my relationships.  I find it easier to put a wall up and dig my heels into the dirt of negativity, than allow myself to be vulnerable and, dare I say it, happy!  I self-sabotage way more than I'd like to admit and the worst part is that I am mostly aware of when I am doing it. 

I wouldn't say this is necessarily the norm, but it is definitely something that has popped back up in my life recently and is an issue that I really want to learn how to bring into balance.  While I don't know how to exactly "fix" this part of myself, I think acknowledging it and giving myself a little grace is the first step.  I also have to remind myself that I don't have to be so darn hard on myself all of the time either.  I am very lucky to have people in my life who not only know I struggle with this, but who love me anyway.  No matter what walls I put up, they are always there when they come back down again and I am forever thankful for these amazing people in my life! 

So here's to a little grace, healing, positive energy and lots of love & laughs moving forward.  Here's to learning how to be happy!! 




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